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De's avatar

There is a wonderful warm tone to your writing and I feel and truly appreciate your compassion. Speaking of lists I actually wrote down the name of your site onto my 'serious' to do's... meaning that I will read, engage and keep up. 🎵You've got a friend....🎵 I have written on similar themes, but I had always couched the pain, anger and hard truths with humor

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Alice Kuipers's avatar

Interesting—humour can be like that, a reflective shield. Sometimes, it’s helpful because the reflection helps you see, and other times the glare is blinding and nothing is revealed.

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De's avatar

Yes, my parents were Maritimers and humor is a boey in hard times. Awareness of my tendency to reveal too much or nothing is huge as is sorting real from surface connections.

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Alice Kuipers's avatar

It's a very English trait, too. We navigate so much with humour and sometimes it gets absolutely to the heart of it. Other times, not so much. xox

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Silvia Põldaru's avatar

Goodness, that voice in the head - it keeps following me throughout the years. One thing I've learned though is that I don't have to believe everything she says and that's been life-changing. Breath practice has helped with that. And Susan's book was really life-changing. It helped me embrace my introversion rather than shame it. It was a massive lightbulb moment.

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Alice Kuipers's avatar

I love this--thank you for sharing, Silvia. I'm enjoying Susan's book, too!

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Bernie L Cruikshank's avatar

Your words, even if they were scratched together hastily amongst the "wild and chaos" are so eloquent. Perhaps you could substitute a "flower du jour" for the forget me not (do we really not have them?). So in April you could go on the riverbank and capture a crocus or in May you could lunch by a liliac or in June the eyes could feast upon a.... you get the drift. A moment to reach down and in. A second to find the value in the beauty of the earth as humankind crashes around you. HUGS. Bernie

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Alice Kuipers's avatar

Thank you, Bernie. A flower du jour is a beautiful idea. Just wonderful. Crocuses and tulips and lilacs and wildflowers. I'm always keen to learn their names.

xoxo

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Maria Hanley's avatar

I was just thinking, as I looked at my planner last night, that I need to rethink how I'm managing my time. Instead of figuring out how to get it all done, what can I remove from the list instead? How can I create space? This essay was a lovely way to start my week. Thank you.

I love so many Substacks, but Between by Rebecca Jones is one of my faves. https://rebeccaljones.substack.com

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Alice Kuipers's avatar

I spend a little time every Sunday looking ahead at what I can take out of the next few weeks. I think of it as 'saying yes to either family/writing'. I'm also trying to teach myself BEFORE I commit to anything to see if I'd want to do it tomorrow. That helps me reduce my tendancy to want to do everything!

Thanks for the suggestion of Rebecca Jones. I'll look Between up right now.

xoxx

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Camille Brightsmith's avatar

https://open.substack.com/pub/kimvanbruggen/p/coming-out-of-wintering-how-cold?r=18hqih&utm_medium=ios

I love this writer because it’s a subject I know nothing about and she is brave, brave, brave!

I also love reading Susie Bright. 🥰

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Alice Kuipers's avatar

Thank you so much! I'm going to look up both of these xoxo

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Marika Páez Wiesen's avatar

A tumble of thought-provoking loveliness. Thank you!

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Alice Kuipers's avatar

Thank you xoxoxo

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Melissa Lee's avatar

Thank you for this beautiful piece of writing Alice, and for the reminder to listen to that voice. I too felt it spoke to my soul. I have just seen the first forget me nots of the season, popping up under the tree where my precious writing companion and soul dog Mac has his final resting place and I love that they will be there every year to remind me x

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Alice Kuipers's avatar

Oh, lovely, Melissa. So good to hear from you and I'm so sorry to hear about Mac. I'm going to keep looking for forget-me-nots here--and perhaps learn the names of the wildflowers we have in Saskatchewan. Thanks for commenting and connecting!

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Sarah. Just Add Hyperfocus's avatar

The lovely chaos of family! And the grounding of the forget-me-nots. Thankyou Alice ☺️.

Made me think of how I always take photos of the beautiful flowers in my cousins’ gardens in UK, and the fat bumblebees.

Here in Oz the native flowers are very different.

I am enjoying a quiet weekend this weekend. Next weekend will be different. My son, his wife and their 2 little boys arrive to stay with us on Thursday, in prep for another son’s wedding on Saturday to his long time partner- they also have 2 little boys.

It will be a celebration in the (large) back yard of one of their friends - they have been landscaping and decorating for weeks! Very hands on and local community which is a joy. My youngest son’s partner is the wedding celebrant, that son is the MC, and my daughter (and the out of town son) are in the groooms-people party.

They work in the music industry so it will definitely be a party with good music 😂.

I will be trying to avoid overwhelm, standing on the sidelines, appreciating these amazing humans of the next generation ❤️.

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Alice Kuipers's avatar

Sounds wonderful and wild! I'm about to take my training to become a celebrant, but for the other main gatherings in life: funerals. So lovely that your youngest son's partner is the celebrant. May you all have a lot of joy--and exactly that, those moments of peace on the sides, too!

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Kiyomi Kirkpatrick's avatar

So glad to read you and your children were visiting your family last week. I am sure it was wonderful to all be together. The photo is lovely (you know how much I love flowers!) and so is this piece. Being fully present in those precious moments is a challenge, but capturing them so well, to read and re-read, is a gift. Thank you, Alice ❤️

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Alice Kuipers's avatar

Thank you, Kiyomi. Like your beautiful--tiny--picture of the lake, all of this. xoxo.

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Joyce's avatar

I'm pretty new to Substack, having just been introduced to it by a watercolor artist/ author I follow. I absolutely love your writing, especially this piece. It truly spoke to my soul, and that doesn't happen all that often! Thank you for offering this free subscription, it gave me the opportunity to explore your offering and I'm grateful for that.

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Alice Kuipers's avatar

This is so lovely for me to read. It was harder to write this week--the jet lag of return, the rush of emails, the settling of the children back into school after the break. These tiny flowers gave me a little peace in it all. You taking time to comment here fills me with a quiet joy. Thank you, Joyce. xoxo

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Rita Bates's avatar

Thank you, Alice, for sharing this moment with us. I too love photographing flowers and trees. Without realizing what I was doing, my daughter pointed out that I do this when I can’t find the words to describe how I’m feeling (she’s very intuitive).The photos start out dark and eventually begin to brighten as I work my way through my emotions to find the words. I recently wrote a memoir based short story incorporating the photographs. I look forward to your next post.

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Alice Kuipers's avatar

Oh, the memoir sounds fascinating, both as a creative project for you and for a reader. I like that your daughter pointed out your interest in flowers and tree, and reason for it: thanks for sharing it here, it gives me something to think about.

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