A note I wrote last week has gathered a lot of attention. I almost didn’t share it—I was shy, but then I dared.
This was the note:
Last night, a woman cut in line in front of my daughter and I. The woman didn’t know she was doing it because she didn’t see us.
She’s well-known and very wealthy. My guess is that people want things from her all the time, so she decides who is worth her time and attention. And she tunes out the rest of us.
My daughter and I waited and chatted because it didn’t matter to us that this woman wanted to be served right that moment. We weren’t in any rush.
But, it did remind me that I always want to be someone who notices other people, who asks questions, who feels lucky to meet someone else, and who takes a moment to realise when another person, especially (for me) another woman with a teenage girl beside her, is walking alongside.
Sooooo, even if I sell millions of books one day, and live like Nicole Kidman does in that house in The Perfect Couple, I always want to be someone who notices who else is nearby, and I want to take a moment to smile, say hi, and never cut in line.
Lots of people on here took time to comment, some sharing how perhaps there was something I hadn’t seen (very possible) and there was no way to know the woman’s story (true!) And many more people noting how important it is to be kind.
This comment from
stayed with me, as did many others:Alice, you are so right - at the end of the day, celebrity or not - we are humans & the way we behave or treat others is a reflection of who we are. Being aware of people around us is vital. We are all unique, but we are equally part of something bigger. And meeting someone well known speaks volumes about the type of human they actually are in real life.
It got me thinking about kindness. The small acts, how they change us. Both when others are kind, and when we are kind ourselves.
So thank you for the comments and the conversation—thank you, too, those of you who felt I’d missed something, for your courtesy and dialogue. What I notice is how all of us look for and want kindness, and now today I want to sprinkle it everywhere.
(Also, I hope you love the photo of me and my daughter. A friend took it, reminding me how much I want to take more photographs and dare).
xoxoxo
Alice
(July/August Life-Changing Book Club will be next week now as this post slipped in instead) x
If you’re new here, my name is Alice Kuipers and I’m a writer, mother and dog & cat-owner transplanted twenty years ago to the Canadian prairies from England. I’ve published fourteen books in 36 countries and my writing has been described as: “For storytellers and story lovers,” by Kirkus Reviews; ‘Gorgeous, heart-ripping, important,” by VOYA; and “Intense and wonderful” by Bif Naked. Join me for coffee breaks, book conversations, and to share my writing life together.
Xoxo
I love this! I worked for many years in the service industry, and I always try to make eye contact and really SEE the person who is serving me. Working with the public also taught me what a big difference just a little bit of kindness can make!
Great story - I love how you write about the little things in life - kindness is so easy to give and receive - but can also go unnoticed.
And unfortunately it is easy to be unkind, or not see something. To be unaware.
Yesterday I realised that I had inadvertently jumped the queue as the end of the queue wasn't obvious - where it fed into the check out area.
And it wasn't me buying something, it was my friend so we had been talking and had just walked to an empty checkout! Those in the queue were kind and didn't draw attention to our obliviousness!
But also I was kind and didn't draw it to my friend's attention as she would have been mortified.